Having a Hard Time

Let me tell you about how things are going for me. I don't often vent or talk about unpleasant things on this blog (I like happy things), but I'm going to today. Bear with me. O.K. Here goes (in no particular order):

It's Saturday. My apartment is a mess. Too many dishes are unwashed. The dishwasher hasn't been working well lately. The pilot light on our water heater went out last night and we haven't been able to get it back on yet. So, even though we have lots of dishes that need to be done, we can't because we need hot water to both run the dishwasher (that doesn't wash dishes very well anyway) and wash dishes by hand. At the moment, mornings are not my best time, and if I don't get the right kind of breakfast, I don't have enough energy to do a lot. I haven't been feeding my family very well, partly because of how I've been feeling, and partly because of the state of my kitchen. I've been wasting too much time with the Wii since we got it. My daughter has a birthday party to go to and we haven't wrapped the presents yet. My son lately has decided to be Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. We all need baths or showers, but don't have warm water for those. I get frustrated with myself for all the things that I know I should be doing but am not and I take it out on my family by getting frustrated or impatient (though I've been doing really well lately with not losing my temper). I'm not as supportive as I'd like to be with my husband's weight loss goals because I haven't felt up to fixing good meals. There are some days when the kids and I don't even get out of our pajamas. Blah blah blah blah blah. There are plenty more, but that's all I can think of right now.

Thank you. Sometimes it helps to just vent and talk about frustrations. Through this all, I do feel very blessed. I have such a patient husband. My kids are adorable. Our newest one had a healthy heartbeat when we went to our prenatal appointment the other day. I haven't thrown up yet due to pregnancy (mostly just feeling hungry and tired). I get to hear or read from my brothers and sisters and parents almost daily because of a family blog where we all contribute. I could go on and on about how many more blessings I have than frustrations. I think I will:

None of us are sick right now (yay for winter being over-ish). We all got to hear the baby's heartbeat. I get to be a stay at home mom (best job in the world). Tomorrow is Sunday and we'll all get to go to our classes at church (because we're not sick). We have a great ward. My kids play together well- most of the time. They are so cute. They are also polite- most of the time. My husband is so talented and I often get to see amazing balloon sculptures up close. Sometimes I even get to participate in creating amazing balloon sculptures (I'll talk later about what we get to build in June). We get to go home to Oregon and Washington for a visit this summer. Taxes are done- we'll get more back than we paid. I can still do laundry because I wash most of the stuff on cold anyway. The slow season is over for my husband's work. He's even got a deal going with Jumpin' Jacks (inflatable playgrounds) to be an option for their birthday packages. Because the internet can be used for good, our current desktop background is a picture taken just the other day of my parents at the Oregon Coast, with the Heceta Head Lighthouse in the background. I do believe the Heceta Head Lighthouse is the most photographed lighthouse on the Oregon Coast. Now every time I look at the computer, I get to see my parents (and the Oregon Coast). I love my parents. They have been such a good example to me of so many things in my life- a happy marriage, supporting each other through trials, loving parents, wonderful grandparents, strong testimonies, good teachers.

I really am blessed in so many ways.

Thank You. I feel much better. Time to get dressed and wrap presents (Jeremy already built a balloon sculpture for the birthday girl).

Now I'm going to start crying because I feel so blessed instead of being stressed.