The KAT's Meow

In Primary, the children were learning "Love One Another" with the sign language and when they finished, Jet said loudly for everyone to hear, "I did it so good."

 

 

   

 

 

 

Jet will often ask for help for us to be kind to each other in prayers. When saying the blessing on our dinner one evening, he prayed, "Help us be kind to the food."

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mom: I love you very much.

Jet: Yes, you do. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mom: Do you want to visit Oregon and Washington? To visit Grandma and Grandpa? 

Jet: I want to visit George-grain Washington and go to Grandma and Grandpa's house.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jet: Does this game have a zebra?

Mom: Can you spot a zebra? I mean, can you stripe a zebra? 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jr. Jr.: Are you okay, Mom?

Mom: No.

Jet: I'm fine. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jr.Jr.: Mom, I have a friend named Nick and apparently, his parents think he's poison.

Mom (looks concerned).

Jr. Jr.: I asked his parents about him and they just went on and on about, "Our son, Nick." 

Mom (immediately pops up to add that to The KAT's Meow). 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jet (to Nichole): Are you awake?

Nichole: Yes.

Jet: Why?

Nichole: Because you pushed my head.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jet "learned" the song, "Trogdor," from hearing us sing it. It's from Homestar Runner. In the song, Trogdor is a dragon who burninates all the peasants in their thatch roof cottages!

Jet's version when he sings it has become "Tractor" who burninates the "presents" in their "cabbages." 

Unbirthday

Jet: Is it my birthday?

Mom: No, it's not your birthday. It's your unbirthday.

Jet: It's my unbirthday? Yay. We should make cake for my unbirthday. 

 

Later he told me we should make pizza and cake for his unbirthday. So we made a cake. We made pizza. We blew noisemakers. We sang "A Very Merry Unbirthday." When he asked if there would be presents, my husband pulled out some swag from one of his fairs and put it in a box. We didn't go so far as to wrap it. It wasn't his birthday, after all. It was his unbirthday.

 

We are the Telfords and we love finding reasons to celebrate.  

 

P.S. This was on January 23, Pie Day. Since we were already making pizza pie for dinner, it just all fit... except that we made cake instead of pie for dessert. 

The KAT's Meow

Because I forgot to put it on my post about Maple Syrup Day-

Mom: It's Maple Syrup Day.

Jr.: Oh. Or should I say, "Eh?"

 

 

 

 

Jr. Jr. (after seeing me with the book, Anne of Green Gables): You know they made a parody of that book where they changed the main character to be a turkey. Anne of Green Gobbles.

 

  

 

 

Mom (to Jet): You're so precious.

Jet: Like a strawberry. 

 

 

 

 

Jr.: I'm making pizza and other stuff. They're just lying on the couch. 

Jr. Jr.: The moon landing wasn't real.

I'm lying on the couch. 

 

 

 

 

Jet (while looking at a Christmas letter from friends- he can't read yet): Merry Christmas. I hope you have a very good Christmas with your family.

Aww. That's so sweet.

 

 

 

 

Jet: We'll give cookies to Santa. Then Santa will come and give me presents with toys in them. 

The KAT's Meow

Mom: I'm tired. I want to get my pajamas on, snuggle up with my sweetheart, and go to sleep.

Jet: You want to snuggle up with me?

Mom: Awwwww.

 

 

 

 

 

Mom: Lying is unethical in my opinion.

Dad: That's why I sit up.

 

 

 

 

 

Mom: May I have my phone? It's going to die if you keep playing with it.

Jet: Don't worry, Mom. It's electric. It won't die. 

 

 

 

 

 

Mom (to Jet): You're so adorable.

Lucky (to Jet): You're so lucky.

Jet: I'm so musical.

(proceeds to play with a toy guitar) 

 

 

 

 

 

Jet taught me a new song.

"Turkey run away

Or you'll be eaten for Thanksgiving Day." 

The KAT's Meow

Jet (while fanning himself with his hand): I'm hot. I need marshmallows.

 

 

 

Jet: I want milk.

Mom: Yes. It's good for your body.

Jet: My body's having issues. I can drink this. 

 

 

 

Overheard at an elementary school Fall Festival: You want to play this game, smartest kid in our class?

(This was directed at my child. I had to smile)

The KAT's Meow

Jet decided he wanted to name the Polish sausage Jeremy was cutting up. He named it "Meg." 

Jeremy: Next time I do mountain man breakfast and I use Polish sausage and bacon, I can say I used Megs and bacon.

Jet then decided to speak for Meg: Oh no. Don't cut me up. Noooo.

 

 

 

In Primary, the children were singing, "To Be a Pioneer." Jet kept singing, "To be a pirate king."  

The KAT's Meow

"That oven is for babies." -Jet talking about the play kitchen in the nursery, not about a gingerbread house owned by a witch.

The KAT's Meow

I told Jet I was going to watch Dancing with the Stars. He said, "Dancing with the stars? Not dancing with the moon?"

 

 

 

 

Heard on a Sunday afternoon-

Jeremy: What is she even wearing out there?

Lucky: Woah.

Jeremy: There's bigger tuna than that.

 

 

 

 

We don't swear in our family. I spilled applesauce one day and this was Jet's response-

Oh, yogurts. Oh, yogurts and cheese.  

Jet: I stole the coins. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine forever!

 

 

 

 

Jr. Jr. (while putting on pizza toppings): You take a few pieces of pepperoni and...

Jet: Put them in my mouth.

 

 

 

 

Nichole: I still have a slight obsession with poisons but I've expanded it into true crime. 

Nichole: I'm more into the torture thing, honestly.

The KAT's Meow

Jet: I want Tinker Bell to feel me better.

Jr. reminded me that we put the Tinker Bell towel down when someone isn't feeling well.

 

Dad: Jet, I really want to give you a hug.

Jet: Oh well. (and walks away)

 

 

 

I told Jet the song I was singing was from The Beatles. He didn't want me to sing the "bug" song. A little bit later, he decided to sing a grasshopper song. "I'm a grasshopper. Yeah yeah yeah. I'm a grasshopper. Yeah yeah yeah." Sounds like some lyrics from The Beatles. 

Jet (lying down): Can I have a glass of water?

Mommy: Of course.

Mommy (brings cup of water): Here you go. You'll have to sit up to drink it.

Jet: 

Mommy: Here's your water. You'll have to sit up to drink it.

Jet (sighs): Fine. (sits up)

The sun was going down.

Jet: Oh no. The world turned to dark.

The KAT's Meow

Jr.: Whenever someone asks, "May I have some condiments?" I'll answer, "I don't know. Mayo have some condiments?" 

Jr.: I don't know if I like Miracle Whip. I mayo may not.

Jr.: If a pregnant woman is making an ice sculpture, goes into labor, then knocks it over, doesn't that mean that her water broke twice? 

Jr.: Apatosaurus, the gentler cousin to Aslaposaurus.

Jr. Jr.: That was an awesome expression. I know because I made it.

Jet: More ice cream?

Me: How do you ask nicely?

Jet: Please.

Jet (as I'm dishing out his ice cream): Ice cream for me?

Jr. Jr.: Nichole, you like sweet tea because you are a sweetie.

Everyone: Awwww.

 

 

 

Jet: Let's watch a movie. And the popcorn can join us! 

Jet had something like a manual he was unfolding and looking at.

Me: What does Jet have?

Jr. Jr.: I don't know.

Jet: A paper.

Jr. Jr. was carrying Jet.

Jr. Jr.: Look up. What do you see? Do you see the sky?

I leaned over because I was a step above.

Me: Look up. What do you see? Do you see Mommy?

Jet: Mommy can fly like a bird. Jr. Jr. can fly like an eagle. Jr. Jr. can bawk like a chicken. Bawk. Bawk.

The KAT's Meow

While we were in Oregon on our vacation, there was a point where my brother Todd, Jet, and I were playing with some dragons and mythological creature toys. Jet was playing with a little dragon and I was playing with a phoenix.

Little Dragon (Jet): I have teeth.

Phoenix (me): Do you have sharp teeth to eat things? What do you eat?

Little Dragon (quietly): I eat Daddy.

Phoenix: What? What do you eat?

Little Dragon: I eat Dad and Uncle Todd.

The KAT's Meow

Jet (in June): Wake up, Daddy! It's time for Christmas!

The KAT's Meow

Mom: Can you get out of the kitchen please? 

Jet: No.

Mom: Why not?

Jet: Cause I love you... so much.

Mom and Dad (laughter laughter laughter)

The KAT's Meow

I was trying to get Jet to use his manners when asking me to open some candy so I said, "Mommy, will you please open this for me?" He responded with, "I will open it for you." Cute cute cute.  

Jr. Jr. had something in his hand. Jet took it from him and said, "That's yucky. You'll get sick."

Lucky: When people give you a shot, they're just making sure you're not a balloon person.

Jr. Jr.: What does a robot get for its birthday? A cake made out of 1's and 0's.

The KAT's Meow

Kristin: Will miracles happen for me? The short answer is, "Yes."

Jr. Jr.: The long answer is, "Affirmative."

 

 

 

Mom: Aagh, I just kicked a dinosaur. That is not an uncommon phrase to hear in this home.

 

 

 

Dad (laughed): Link has allergies.

Others: Why?

Because it went from Breath of the Wild to Tears of the Kingdom. 

Jr. (while looking at the driver's manual): You know what I find funny? The first thing on "Appendix A" is "Organ donation."

The KAT's Meow

Dad: Do you know what frankincense is?

Jr.: It's right there in the name. It's incense that smells like hot dogs.

Everyone: Ewwww.

Jr. Jr.: Nichole, I'm going to make you put out the milk and cookies. I didn't write a letter to Santa. I didn't get a picture with the mall Santa. I'm going to get a ride on the Polar Express!

The KAT's Meow

Jr.: Why is it best to go on dates after you get a sunburn?

Mom: Why?

Jr.: Because while you're healing you're appealing.

Mom: Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. 

Mom: What should we eat for breakfast?

Jet: Cookies.

Mom: No, we're not going to eat cookies. We need to eat breakfast. What should we eat for breakfast?

Jet (takes a moment to think about it): Eat chocolate cake.

*Laughter*

Jet: Eat chocolate cake. Eat chocolate cake.

-a minute later-

Jet: Eat chocolate marshmallows.

-Later-

Mom: We need to eat real food for breakfast. What should we eat.

Jet: Uh... candy.

 

We had fried rice. 

Jet found my phone and pushed the Siri button, saying, "Hey, Siri, text Jeremy." Siri interpreted it as, "Text Tami," (someone else in my contacts) and asked what he wanted to say. Jet again said, "Text Jeremy," which Siri interpreted as, "Taxidermy." I stopped it before Jet could say yes to, "Do you want to send it?" So Tami almost got a text from me saying, "Taxidermy."

I told this story to Tami later and she got a big kick out of it.

The KAT's Meow

When headed out the door to an appointment-

Mommy: Do you want to take Spinosaurus?

Jet: No.

Mommy: Do you want to take Pteranodon?

Jet: No.

Mommy: What dinosaur do you want to take?

Jet: Acrocanthosaurus.

Mommy: Ha Ha Ha Ha. Acrocanthosaurus it is. 

  

Jr. Jr.: How do you make poached eggs?

Mommy: I don't know actually.

Jr. Jr.: I do. You have to steal them.

Mommy: Oh, because they're poached.

Jr. Jr.: What's an etto?

Mom: What?

Jr. Jr.: People keep talking about singers singing in falsetto. So I'm wondering what an actual etto sounds like.

Mom: Oh. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.

Lucky (after seeing it on facebook): I was going to cook an alligator for dinner then I realized we didn't have a croc pot.

The KAT's Meow

Lucky: So no bake cookies are good for your bones.

Mom: Oh, because they have milk in them. But the sugar in them rots your teeth.

Jr. Jr.: Your teeth are bones so they both strengthen your teeth and rot your teeth. It's like granola bars wrapped in bacon. 

 

 

Jr.: Now let's go watch people being murdered.

Mom: What did you say?

Jr.: Now let's go watch people being murdered.

Mom: What are you watching?

Jr.: Book of Mormon videos.

Mom: OK. That's appropriate for Sunday.

The KAT's Meow

When cooking bacon on National Bacon Day, December 30, 2021-

Jr.: Are we sure this bacon is pig. It seems more like llama.

Mom: Huh?

Jr.: It spits.

Jr.: Camel. I meant camel.

Dad: Llamas also spit.

Jr.: I was referencing a camel.